"The Best of times, Not even close to the worst of times".... The tail end of a mighty adventure.

Korea still remains a pretty outstanding time even after 1 year and 3 months. These days, time is passing by pretty fast, and my days have been blending together. I am not without some semi interesting stories though. As you are all aware I have punished myself severely by taking on an accelerated paralegal class while teaching full time here in Korea. I am not complaining, but if you have ever had the misfortune of reading legal text books; you can understand the pain I feel on a day to day basis. As the saying goes, "a means to an end."

With my week days becoming rather stressful I usually just kick back and relax on the weekend. This weekend however was a horse of a different color. As it was when I first arrived to Korea I, along with several friends went off the deep end this weekend. Highlights of the night included dancing, singing, some beverages, and of course being called homosexual three times on three separate occasions. I must say I have never had my sexuality questioned so many times in one night, so I was pretty taken back. Where does this all stem from you ask? Well, I have a couple theories; either it is due to the fact that my good looks, style, and cultural aptitude lead people to believe I am of the homosexual nature, or it is due to the fact that I happen to have a best friend that is prettier than most, or maybe it is because when I am out at clubs here in Korea, Korean men are more touchy feely with me than a lot women I have met. (hahhaah) I guess Ill leave it up to your interpretation.

Now you may be wondering, what could he possibly mean by touchy feely? Well let me reflect on some of my highly homoerotic run-ins. the first time I ever went out to a club in Korea a man caressed my faced and called me "handsome guy." I came to realize that this was very common and most of my friends/coworkers here in Korea had similar experiences. Soon however, the encounters became a bit more intense. One of the most memorable of these was when I was dancing with my friend Samantha at a local club known as "MC" (previously know as "Black People Music Club") That is not a joke by the way. Anyway, this korean guy came up behind me while I was dancing with Samantha grabbed my hips, then put his hands in my pockets to; what I thought was rob me, but instead grabbed my easter basket and congratulated me on my size. (Disclaimer... I am not claiming to be any more well endowed than the next guy.) Though this may be politically incorrect of me to say, here in Korea the stereotype is true. Korean guys have the tiniest hands I have ever seen, which in comparison... well you get the idea.

This brings me to one of my other questionable experiences with the male population here. Back in my early months here in Korea, my good friend suzy's brother came to visit, and so did my friend Chau's boyfriend, Jake. Us unsuspecting foreigners were told to mosey on over to a korean spa where we could relax in a sauna, bathe in mineral baths, and receive massages. No! I don't mean "Massages" I mean legit Massages as in a back rub. If you are interested in the other kind of massage, I know someone that may be able to enlighten you, but I will not mention his name. Lets just say it rhymes with.... Lion Soup Co. (hahhaha JK dude, have to keep the joke going.) Anyway... Jake, Phillip, and myself went on over to the spa, and upon entering were told to immediately strip down to our "natural clothing" and then head on in. All three of us frantically looked at each other, but eventually we decided to just go for it. After some reluctant clothing removal we headed over to the mineral-bath room where a few dozen korean men were enjoying some R&R. This is where things got pretty awkward. When we walked into the room you would have thought time stood still by the frozen looks that were now plastered on the faces of all of our "new fans". After 30 seconds of being eyeballed up and down, we finally realized what it truly felt like to be objectified. Even as we briskly walked to the baths; eyes followed us the entire way. We finally made it to a mineral bath after what felt like a couple of hours. We plopped into the water and began to laugh about the situation we were in. Just when we thought it could not get any more awkward, several korean men joined the mineral bath. This would be normal here in Korea, but the new guests kept peering into the water, through the waves that were barely obstructing there view in order to catch a glimpse of the proof that were were all men. Needless to say, it was pretty awkward.

I wish I could say those were the only awkward moments I have been made to endure, but this simply is not the case. I guess in the end I can only take it as a compliment. I must say Korea never seizes to amaze, and I have just as many stories with the opposite sex that would gain me a chuckle or 2 from an audience. However, that would work against the thesis of this blog haha. I will say that I was twice "pantzed" by a korean girl, underwear and all, while in a packed club in Hongdae. Ill save that story for another time.

Outside the abnormal; I have been hiking, playing frisbee, eating yummy food, having fun with my classes, and recently experienced my friend Warren's son's first birthday. It was a hell of a time. Had some yummy food, gave a lame speech, and even got a parting gift out of the deal. Another great story was watching Warren get chewed out by a Korean Ajuma (older woman) after he accidentally hit a baby with a frisbee. Oh yeah! I also tried dog soup. I had to do it in order to prevent myself from being to ethnocentric. It was pretty terrible, and will never be eaten again. Outside from that, I guess I am pretty content.

Last thing I want to mention is the fact that I miss my friends and I am anxiously awaiting another reunion tour stateside. I am also excited about my trip to Thailand with one of the most entertaining girls/people I know. I am counting down the days to embark on our adventure because it is going to be a killer time. I am also pumped to redeem the greatest birthday gift I ever received from anyone, which is a 4 hour drive in 6, 200+ thousand dollar cars. When asked today by my best friend Scott if I was excited, I replied, "of course man, I mean 2 dudes, 2 cans of blue monster, 2 completely hetero erections, and 500-650 horses tickling our egg baskets with every gear change... what's not to be excited about. hahahahaah this was perfect because it fit right in to my blog entry as you can see. Anyway I miss "the crew," "the B", Janelle Winters AAL, "sir nibbles", and many more. For those of you keeping tabs on me, thank you as always you are all the best people I know.

**Images**

-Hiking Surisan

-Leon's first Birthday

-Dog soup taste test

-Crazy night out

-Frisbee with warren and the roommates at the local park.

It's been a while, but Im back.

I know it has been quite a while folks, but I am happy to say that I am posting for a special occasion. Also the holidays are coming up, so I might as well provide some new stories of ye ole Korea. What has sparked the revival of this blog are the events of tonight. In order to convey these events, or do them justice in anyway, I will do it in the form of a short story.

It was 11:34pm on a dreary Thursday night in Pyengchon Korea. I found myself submersed in the computer as I usually am around this time. As always I was eating whatever leftovers I cooked from the previous night's home cooked cuisine, and talking to Stephanie about the various woes of her college life.

Dinner consisted of left over rice I had prepared for an important meeting with the CDI elite, which consisted of myself, the beloved Bryan Bucco, Tracy the totalitarian Nguyen; aka "My Boss", Nikki "the angel in disguise" Pena, Gabriela "the broad" Hill, Steven "the dirty deed" cooper, and our house maid Sydney.

Little did I know that the events set forth that night would shape the next 36 hours of my life. Dinner was fairly normal, "The Elite" were discussing the upcoming seminar in which we would put on a play, or should I say "spectacle" that would rival the Radio City Music hall "Christmas Spectacular!!!"

It is very rare to have so much brilliance gather in one spot at the same time, but somehow we made it happen. By the end of the night a script that rivaled Shakespeare's best was created, and we were ready to rehearse. Tracy, the wise and beautiful boss she is decided that the best place to practice this revolutionary script was on an out door stage in the busiest area of our neighboring town; Beomgye. The only problem was that unlike tracy who was born half super model, half genius, and well.... half bear, we all lacked fur coats to protect us from the 30 degree weather Wednesday night. Still, we kept on trucking because thats how we do it here in Korea. After a couple hours of rehearsing our "spectacle," and shivering we called it a night.

Come Thursday afternoon our product was ready, and we put on a show for our fellow teachers, staff, and the head honcho, or should I say head...ache Jefferson; the Manager of our Branch. The play was met with critical acclaim. The immediate reaction was laughter, followed by tears, and culminating with the greatest Kiss ever witnessed in history between myself, and the 2o some girls we work with at my branch. (alright that part may be a bit embellished, but this is my story, so deal) OK where was I? ahhhh yes "the end of "The Spectacle"

After the show we had a normal night of teaching, and then I returned home, which brings me back to the beginning of my story. So, it is 11:34 pm, my dialogue with Steph is reaching a highly intellectually stimulating point when a phone rings. "nananananan wee weee weee woo hoo beep" went the phone. I answered, and on the other end was the distressed cries for help from none other than Bryan himself. "Alex!!! I need your help" he screamed. I replied, "ohhh did you forget you wallet again, and can't pay the Korean masseuse for you "massage?" He replied,"no dummy, the 10th one is always free." After some quick laughs he immediately began to explain the bind he had gotten himself into.

Now, many of you may be thinking what could have possibly happened. Was he kidnapped? Was he sick? Was he lost? Was he caught cross dressing again, and needed bail posted? No!! This was something much funnier. He began to tell me how he was on his way home, and realized that rent was due, so he stopped to get some money at Shinan Bank, which is right downstairs from our apartment. Just when the ATM released that sweet scented Green won, the automated security system activated, locking all of the doors, and removing any chance of getting out. Needless to say he was trapped inside.

What makes this particularly funny was the fact that the bank is surrounded by glass on 2 sides, and is located on a busy street. What this means, is random Korean pedestrians got to walk by the bank and peer in at the babo meegook (Korean for "Stupid American/Bucco) stuck in the bank. By the time I arrived Bryan had already spent 30 minutes failing to figure out ways to escape, all the while suffering the indignity of being laughed at by various onlookers. I myself could not hold back some laughs of my own. Finally after some time had passed I noticed a push-pad security lock, which I purposely typed a false password in in-order to trigger the silent alarm, so that a security guard would come. The security guard did eventually come, but not until after Bryan had called all of his korean friends here in Pyengchon asking for help.

The night came to an end, and Bryan was released by a confused but friendly security guard that looked rather entertained by the 2 foreigners looking at each other from opposite sides of the glass, much like you would see in a conjugal visit at a jail. We returned home, and the adventures of the night were over, but I imagine this will not be the end of the many surprises Korea has to offer.

Thanks for peering in at the blog, all ye who remain faithful. I miss everyone, and I will try to keep more regular posts up. I will be home in March, and want to give some shout outs to Scott, Steph, Mom, Mom #2, Janelle, Kirby, The Bean,"The crew", the Bedles, and more. I miss and love you all. Can't wait to se you in 4 months.

**** Pictures****

1) Bryan stuck in the bank. ( taken from the sidewalk)

2) Bryan stuck (taken up close.)

3) Myself at Seoraksan the highest mountain in South Korea

4) One of the many water falls Seoraksan has to offer

5) The beautiful fall that south Korea provides

World cup week God in heaven I love this place

Dear diary, ( you happy now Steph)

Korea has become what can only be described as a city wide party. Thousands of Koreans were pouring on to the streets to watch Korea play soccer. Pretty incredible site to see. I myself joined Suzy, and a few of my coworkers to watch the game at City Hall, where 60,000 people were cheering and dancing. Before the game I had the distinct privilege of watching some of the finest Korean bands play. This included After School, one of the huge K-pop groups here. before I move on I would just like to mention that Korean music is Abysmal, and I simply cannot understand how it is doing so well. Watching the game was one of the most incredible things I have ever experienced. I sang danced, and was asked to take pictures with tons of Korean people who were ecstatic to see a white guy cheering in Korea for their beloved team. The game was a draw, but by the way the crowd reacted you would have thought they won a war. After yet another all night session in korea I went to class to teach with a lost voice, but loads of energy from the night before. Come Saturday night I was excited to watch both USA, and Korea play in what i thought would be my best night here. As usual the night started off amazing. This time the pre-game show in Coex featured "2pm" one of the biggest groups to come out of Korea, and the first K-pop I heard when i got here. It also started to rain really hard out, but we all bought ponchos, and the rain just made it better. Needless to say the night was looking awesome. My group of friends and I were even filmed cheering, and were asked a few questions about the game by a local News station. This was the fourth time I was on camera since I have arrived. Naturally as promised I gave a shout out to Steph. As you all know Korea lost, and this was just the beginning of my night going down hill. We moved the crew over to Itaewon, a big foreigner area in Korea to watch U.S. play. The whole night we were sitting next to this couple that was cheering for Ghana and pissing everyone off at the bar. This only added to the annoyance I felt when America lost. It was still fun to watch the game, and Korea really showed me a great time this passed week. I guess I can't complain. This weekend I'm off to deokjok- doe island for a July 4th party with about 20 co-workers and friends, so expect a good post next week.

***

1) Awesome old guy in full blown devils attire

2) Korean friends for the night

3) My crew at the tail end of a great night

4) Saturday night Korean game. My co trainiees

5) Myself, Bessy, Omari, Laura, and some adorable Korean kids that I want to steal

Let the good times roll. Yet another crazy 2 weeks.

So let me begin by saying that I will definitely be taking a couple week hiatus from the drinking scene. It has been an incredible 2 weeks. First I was given a raise and now teach a series of upper level classes that all have been going well. My most challenging, but interesting class is master debating and persuasion. Yes I am now a teacher of master-debation. I have head that joke so many times, that it has officially been ran into the ground. The class is amazing though. It has given me an opportunity to really hone in on my teaching abilities, and to work with kids that are arguably smarter than I am. LOL To the fun stuff. My friend Chau had some friends from Cali visiting, and I pretty much spent my passed 2 weeks hanging out with them, and doing all in my power to show them the time of their life. Truth be told I succeeded, but at the expense of yet another couple of weekends of abusing my body with the night life Korea offers. On the bright side I have managed to continuously lose weight because of my steady diet of Korean food, and the fact that I spend at least 6 hours a weekend dancing. I think Im actually starting to get pretty good, either that or the alcohol has taken a worse toll on me than I thought. To sum up our time spent together, myself, Chau, Nguyen, and Thuy spent the passed 2 weeks singing, dancing, laughing at each other, and then waking up the next morning and regretting it. All of the girls were troopers, and Nguyen is like a 4'10" ball of chaotic energy. She parties with the best of them. I took everyone out to my to place here in Korea; Hongdae, and we barred, and clubbed until the sun was out on more than one occasion. It was awesome. because of my complete lack of desire to drink I saw Nguyen, and Thuy off on saturday morning and after some tears I went camping with the "new crew" This consists now of myself, Chris, the lovable Angie, S-Suzy, and our new edition from Colorado Kyle. He was stuck homeless for a couple days so he crashed at the casa de Alex, and witnessed the damage that Korea can do. The camping trip was awesome, and much needed. We played camp games, volley ball, and a little frisbee, and then retired to a sleepless night cuddled on out hard wood floor tent in our 2 MM thick sleeping bags. Still It was a humorous night being yelled at by Korean families to keep it down, and being virtually hated by all surrounding parties. disclosure- We apologize to all Korean families for any pain and suffering we may have caused you on saturday night. As for the Agima's, cry yourself a river. lol Korea continues to amaze me and the good friends I have made here will prolong my desire to leave this place for quite sometime. Thank you to all parties included.

*******

1) Noreabong with Chau, Thuy, Nguyen, and Johnnie Mains my Canadian Coworker

2) Backup dancing for Chau and Nguyen

3) Hongdae street, yes that sign says "Sexy, Booby Booby Party"

4) getting down with Nguyen

5) 630:am after 8 hours of partying.

Master debating. Do it to long and you might go blind?

Yeah that's right I spent my saturday judging my schools first ever debate competition. In all honesty it was a lot of fun. The competing kids were the highest level kids that Chungdahm has. We call them our Masters. They are some of the most brilliant kids I have ever seen. They were truly impressive during their debates. The 2 topics assigned; were should the government regulate video game use, which is a huge addiction and social problem here. The other, was should Korea go to war. The kids were not only well spoken, but argued extremely well on their given side. After that, was dinner with the head honchos of my job; My Faculty Manger travis, and The head of the Branch Jefferson. They treated us to a ton of pizza, and then it was off to my place where I mentally prepared myself for Suzy's favorite club; Black Music club aka MC. (yes that is the actual name) lol. The club is always a great time, I went with my close friends Chris "the train wreck" Amoss, "Sassy" Suzy, my friend samantha, and Suzy's friend Michelle. Later on, Julie, Chau and her friends from home met up with us for one hell of a crazy time. Needless to say it was a great fun. I danced for 6 hours off and on, and highlights of the night were 1st, Michelle unbuttoning the top button of a Korean girl's shirt, and watching the korean girl freak out. 2nd, Samantha's boob coming out while being lifted into the air by 2 metro sexual gay men. Lastly one of those same metro sexual gay men literally grinding on me on the dance floor. One of my more awkward experiences here, but funny none-the-less. Sunday, myself, Chris, Suzy, Julie, and Michelle took a trip to Itaewon, reenacting Night of the Living Dead due to our hangovers. Itaewon is an awesome place with tons of American stores, and places to eat. We went to American Restaurant, which is a diner style place, but it's in Korea so it is way better. After some burgers and fries we called it a day. It was a relaxing end to a crazy weekend.

I will conclude this by saying my experience in Korea is one for the history books. I love my time here, and though I miss home, my friends, and a special vampire that is dear to me (inside joke), it saddens me to think that this will end one day, and I will have to return to reality. My students have been awesome, my friends here are great, and the culture never ceases to amaze me. This is my last week of the term, so sorry for the sappiness. I am going to miss my first classes. Pictures of them are soon to come.

*******

- My Korean male dance partner

- Samantha seconds away from exposing herself

- The debate judges left to right- Cooper, Julie, Lowell, Samantha, Myself, Suzy

- Jefferson, and travis presenting one of the winners with his award.

- The master-debaters .... never gets old

From the Bungie to the Barbecue... Korea kicks ass

Where to begin. Well I had one of my best weekends yet here. Great week of teaching, and I had the distinct privilege of teaching 12 year olds about ergonomics, and design. Oddly enough they loved it. Thursday was my company dinner, and there is nothing more entertaining than seeing your bosses hammered. Then seeing your bosses sing Karaoke, and then see them hung-over in the morning. Cheers to Luke and Travis for being awesome. Saturday I went to Gangnam which is in inner seoul. A lot of nice stores, and very "NY like" in my opinion. I bought some new kicks for 45000 won which is like 40 dollars, and the girls left to get there hair done. Boring I know, but this post gets better. We then went toward Boondong for our bungie jumping experience. After an hour of train we found out they were booked, and had to return the next day. I was a little disappointed, but Suzy was damn near infuriated. We all went back toward Gangnam where we went to doctor fish. This is a coffee shop where you order some java and then rest your feet in water where fish swarm around eating the dead skin off your feet. There were 2 tanks, one with small fish; this one felt great and was relaxing. The other was bigger fish; these were tickling the hell out of me, and one of the strangest things I have ever felt. Also the lovable Angie's mom was visiting, and she hopped right in as if she had done it a million times before. I wasn't going to allow Angie's mom to show me up...... I guess she did looking back she did anyway. We ended the night with Hookah, and some casual drinks. Then it was off to bed. Sunday aka Buddha's birthday I went Bungie jumping with 4 friends. I myself was actually not all that scared and opted to go first. I loved it, but was a little disappointed. It wasn't as scary as I thought it would be. Then Suzy went and she had a similar reaction, as a matter of fact she barely made a noise. My friend Lana eventually gave in and refused to jump. I think I can coerce her into going through with it next time. Now the best was connie who screamed bloody murder all the way down, and even cried a bit. Her scream was so loud that the kids in the park actually got upset and cried. I, along with the rest of the crew, which included Connie's boyfriend Dan laughed hysterically. After a nap in the park we met back up with Angie, and her mom along with Tan, our new friend from NY; to watch the Lantern festival. This is a celebration for Buddha's birthday where large numbers of monks and Buddhist followers parade through the city with lanterns, accompanied with big light up floats. It was an awesome time, and one of my favorite things I have seen so far.

* doctor fish with the crew

* Hookah Bar

* My Big Jump

* One of the many floats

* Some of the thousands of monks parading

Gwanaksan hike, and another weekend living the dream.

The weather has been finally getting nice, so I am able to do the things I love once again. Because of this I am finally starting to see all the great things Korea has to offer. Saturday I went hiking with Suzy and Samantha, at Gwanaksan mountain which is 5 minutes away from my apartment. The views were incredible, and when we reached a look out point a bunch of Korean kids were yelling hello to us. They were so excited to see us foreigners on a hike. Naturally I saw this as a great photo op. The climb was a great time , and I even got to do a little bit of bouldering. All in all it was a great day. After the hike all of us went to the park and basked in the glory that was us. I played a little badminton with one of Suzy's many Korean guy friends, and then called it a day. You will be proud to hear that I did not do much drinking at all. I had 2 beers with a couple coworkers, and that was it. I think I have successfully weaned myself off of the devil's juice. LOL I will end as i have in the past; optimistically. I am still looking forward to my year here and what sort of shenanigans are in store for me.